Divorce and men. Two things that do not go together well at all. Women and divorce are not fantastic either – and kids and divorce probably worse, but men and divorce need some extra mentioning because they are the most neglected and glossed over group in this entire sad mess. Why do we gloss over this anyway? The statistics constantly tell us than men are more vulnerable to mental illness from divorce at every turn. In fact, suicide rates of men after divorce are at a point that is fucking disgraceful!
The reason for this is that the world is a sexist place still – towards men and women, just in different ways. We all expect men to be stoic and man up all the time without letting men have any emotions at all. Men are emotional creatures just as women are. Yet we still have some sort of screwed up group thinking that the optimum in manliness is to be able to cope under any circumstances and be tough as nails no matter how devastating the situation. Manly tears not allowed under any circumstance.
Now this is bad when it comes from women directed at men, and from other men directed at men – but the worst is when a man thinks this is how he has to be and punishes himself for being what he thinks is weak. Nothing is a devastating as self hate and loathing that comes with feeling powerless and weak. There are so many reports of men in terrible mental health situations who just crack, go on shooting sprees, take their kids and wife with them, or suicide by themselves, or cause some sort of atrocity. These are extremes but this sort of stress and pressure is what causes men to fuck themselves up!
Men have feelings and emotions and divorce causes so many of them to boil over they need help. That is what this blog is about – if you are a guy and have been divorced – dotn keep it all inside, feel free to let it out. I will keep righting more on how to cope – and who to keep the hell away from that will make you more miserable, the sexist fucks in the media and real life that’s who …